Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Archive: One Year Ago

Written on the eve of Abigail's first birthday

One Year Ago...
Wednesday, December 20, 2006

It is hard to believe that a year ago today, at 1:01 a.m. I held my baby Abigail for the first time. I have been playing the events of the last two days in my mind, like watching my favorite movie over and over. It's true that I have already forgotten a lot. They say you forget the pain, which is God's way of making you want to have more kids. I don't remember the pain, I just remember being really glad when that epidural started to work. I don't remember the loss of sleep as the hospital room filled with visitors and a ringing phone for about 36 hours. I don't remember how bad that hospital food tasted, just how nice it was to have someone show up at my door with three decent meals a day. I don't remember the pain of nursing Abigail for the first time, just how I marveled that my body could supply her physical needs. I only remember that my husband was, and is, the most wonderful, caring, loving, supportive husband ever. He watched that whole process of Abigail being born, and never shared any of the "gross" stuff with me until months later, and then only when I asked.

And now I look at this precious girl, one year later, and can't believe that she ever came from me. As we play "Where's Abigail's belly button?", I smile faintly at the knowledge that her little belly button was what once connected her to me. It will be fun spending her teenage years telling her to cover it up. :) Paul and I have learned much this past year, of how to support and help each other, and how to guide Abigail in the truth of God's love for her. I know we have a long, long road ahead of us, but I look forward to it. As sure as I am of God's calling in our lives to work in ministry, I have never been more sure of my place as a wife and mother. It is a sweet privilege that I hope to never take lightly.

As Abigail now crawls across the kitchen floor with my cell phone in one hand and the cordless phone in the other, like she is skiing on phones, I know how quickly she will grow into a young lady. When she was born, I remember thinking that the hospital was giving her to me on loan for one year. One year to get it right, to keep her alive and healthy, and then I would have to turn her back into them at the end of the year. How happy was I to get to December 21st and see no letters from the hospital saying it's time to bring her back! I guess we've done an okay job.

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