Tuesday, October 29, 2013

A Missing Link? I Think Not.

Last weekend, a friend blessed us with use of free passes to The Creation Museum outside of Cincinnati. Abigail had Friday off of school for Parent-Teacher conferences, so we decided to do a little inexpensive overnight trip for some family fun.

Molly is now seven weeks old, and as is usually the case with little babies, we get lots of smiles and oooohs and ahhhs when we are out in public. I am totally biased and think she is incredibly beautiful, as any good mother should think of her child, so I'm never surprised by the attention she gets (even though I know it is par for the newborn course). As we walked around the museum, we would hear mothers softly comment to their husbands or children, "Ooooh, look at how tiny she is! What a sweetheart!" or a grandmother would smile that sweet smile that new babies usually attract.

There was one grandmother in particular who seemed to have a fascination with our little family. We were going through the exhibits at about the same pace and kept stopping around the same spots to look at the displays or to read words on the walls. At each spot, she would make a comment to Paul or myself.

"Ohhh, sweet. How old is your baby?"
"She will be seven weeks tomorrow."
"Oh, and big sisters, too?"
"Yes, she's girl number three!"
"Are you going to try for a boy?"
"Oh, I don't know. Not sure what we are going to do next. (Laughing) A little brother wouldn't stand a chance with these three. He would be dressed like a princess all the time."
"Oh, no. Your husband would make sure he was a real boy."
(That comment could be a whole separate blog post unto itself....)

Pleasantries over. On to the next room. I stopped to read and explain something to Abigail. Grandma was standing nearby again. She commented on how she liked my necklace, which has three charms with each girl's name and birthstone. I thanked her kindly and moved on to the next room.

A few minutes later, she walked up to me again. Wow, this sweet lady just really had to think our family over.

"Honey, I will pray that God gives you a boy. Your husband needs a boy. I know God knows who you are, and I will pray for a boy for your family."

Wow. I just, um....wow. Not one to always think quickly on my feet or to start a verbal debate with a well-intentioned grandmother in the middle of a display about Noah's flood, I just smiled and said thank you and walked on to the rest of my little crew. Of course, I gave Paul a good chuckle, eye roll, and thoughts on that last bit of conversation. Sometimes I believe God gave me Paul to save a lot of well-meaning strangers from what I really think of their opinion.

Here's the thing. Yes, we have joked about Paul's need for a boy in our house. It's what families do. Whether we are right or wrong in that joking is really on us to decide....it's our joke, our little funny when the estrogen flows a little too freely in our house. And no, we do not yet know what the completion of our family will look like. It could very-well be completed now, but we have not yet seen if that is the case in a short seven weeks. It's future could involve one more pregnancy or adding to our family through adoption. There may be a boy in our future, there may be more girls. We are totally content in this moment with only God seeing that completed family photo for us. And let the record show that my husband even said the words to me after that grandmother's conversation that if we do have more children, he would be fine to have another girl. He likes girls. They are fun. And we do not take it as some strange quirk or coincidence that the Lord has seen it fit to give us girls.

No matter whether our family is completed for the future or not remains to be seen. But our family is complete in this moment. We are not lacking or unfulfilled in any way, shape, or form for not having a son. Our daughters are precious to us. They are wholly loved. We feel great purpose in the task of raising daughters. We consider ourselves fully blessed for the ability to have children at all.

So, thank you, Grandmother at The Creation Museum. Pray whatever you see fit to pray. But know that I am not praying for a son. I'm praying for God to help us to parent our daughters very, very well, that they may be world-changing, beautiful-feet-walking, Jesus-loving, mighty and humble women.