Code Words

There are certain things I should have figured out by now. I've had two and a half years of learning the language. Well, about a year and a half of actual language development. There are certain things Rosetta Stone just can't teach you. There are the words and the meaning behind the words. Here are some examples:

Abigail says: "Mommy, Strawberry Shortcake cleaned the bathtub."
Abigail means: "Mommy, while I was taking my bath, I used Strawberry Shortcake's hair to scrub the sides of the bathtub. Oh, and I also sloshed a lot of water out of the tub onto the floor."

Abigail says: "Can you put my apron on? I'm going to cook for you."
Abigail means: "I found this apron in the drawer under a stack of bibs and dishtowels. I took all of those out and lined them up on the kitchen floor. I am going to leave them on the kitchen floor until you decide to put them away yourself."

Abigail says: "I'm making you lunch."
Abigail means: "Along with my apron, I just got out all of the pots and pans under the counter. Even the ones waaaay back in the back that you never use and have to wedge in there just right to get them to fit. They are all over the floor, and I'll need your help putting them back, because they are easier to get out than in."

Abigail says: "Mommy, do I have my big girl panties on?"
Abigail means: "I just realized I have to go potty. If I have my big girl panties on, I will use the big potty. If you say I have a Pull-up on, I'm just gonna go in my pants instead. Just checking."

Abigail says: "Are we in a restaurant?"
Abigail means: "You told me that I cannot take my shoes off at a restaurant. We might be at a store, or church, or anywhere else besides home, and I want to take my shoes off. I'm going to take you at your word that I only have to leave my shoes on in a restaurant, so if we are at the grocery store, these puppies are coming off."

Abigail says: "Don't look at me/Don't come in here."
Abigail means: "I totally did something I wasn't supposed to do, but I'm not done doing it. Don't look at me doing it. Don't come in here and tell me to stop."

Abigail says, multiple times a day in her sweetest little voice: "Mommy, I love you."
Abigail means: "Mommy, I really do love you. I have also sensed your reaction and cuddling to how I say that, and I like it. So I will say it a lot because whatever you are doing, you stop doing it and hug me and tell me you love me, too. Right now I just mean it. Someday, when I'm three, (because all things are going to be better when I'm three), I will probably use it to get out of trouble."

Abigail says: "I'm not little, I'm big" or "When I'm three, I can do it."
Abigail means: "It's tough being two and a half. Everyone tells me what a big girl I am, but then everything I want to do that a big girl would do, they tell me I'm too little. Adults are confusing, and the kids who are just a little bigger than me aren't fair. They obviously don't see what a big girl I am. I guess I'll get to do it when I'm three. Three must be better than two."

So, if you ever hear Abigail say these things to you, you have now been given a lesson in her language. My college communications class talked about hearing versus listening. She's saying a lot these days, but meaning oh so much more. Maybe instead of English, I should have majored in Toddler.